I haven’t slept a wink. Not because I hate sleep. On the contrary, I love it muchly. It’s because where I am sitting (in our living room on my sofa), across from me on our love seat is my daughter Eliana. She is so peaceful; a mixture of curly hair, random eye rubs and light snoring.
Why is she on our couch at 6 AM and not in bed? Well at around 11:30 or so, she began to whimper and couldn’t be consoled back to sleep. When she gets into those mode, Wifey and I know that we’re in for a long night. After doing some visit (which consists of checking on her, giving her some water and singing songs), she told me something that really made me sad. She said, “I don’t like it when you leave.”
Now context: Today I go away for a few days on a retreat with some of the best people around (#insideout13) and had my bag packed. This is my first retreat, as pointed out by Wifey, that doesn’t have Eliana attending. And though my daughter knows I love her, she was sad that I had (and still have to go). So I did something quite fun. I took her out of bed and brought her down to watch a basketball game with me.
Now this might not be a big deal to you but this is something I would have wanted my dad to do with me when I was little (he’d more likely do it now if he had the time again…he’s a good man). I sat her on my knee and explained who was who and why this would be her favorite game. And I know she would remember who Kobe Bean Bryant is or why the Lakers are important but she’ll always remember the time she fell asleep on Daddy after reading two Bible stories and watching the Lakers mash the Timberwolves.
I often don’t think of myself as a good husband or father (I mean I know I am but sometimes in the busyness of life and my own mistakes, I feel I fall short) but tonight? Tonight was a win. And so all night I’ve just watched her sleep (while also watching sports scores…) and EVEN got to hang with Liam too, which is normally NOT fun at 4 AM:)
Making memories. I’m glad early this morning I got to make some.
PS. – She just woke up and said “I had the best dream ever!” Now she’s talking about her cousin…